Gimme what I want


My first memory of wanting something so much that I would work for it at icky jobs like washing the Friday fish fry dishes and cleaning the drains and scrubbing the bathroom was in 3rd grade in the early 60s. I wanted a Tressy doll, one of those Barbie look alikes, but she had dark brown hair that would grow (it unwound from a roll in her tiny abdominal cavity). I did a lot of work, that was when 10 cents was a weekly allowance, to get that doll whose hair unrolled and rerolled successfully maybe 15 times. I didn’t even really like playing with dolls, it was just that everyone else was doing it every recess through the winter months and they had Barbies, I never had a Barbie doll. The phase passed not much after I finally had the money to get her. I put her away in among countless outfits my mom had sewn for her, my mom liked to play with dolls as a kid, and took her out maybe three or four times after that.

What I want now is satisfaction with what I have and I’m willing to work for it, doing dishes, cleaning the drains and scrubbing the bathroom or maybe not. No allowance money, no Barbie look alikes. It’s a little more ephemeral and everybody else isn’t doing it, but some are. There’s a certain balance I’m trying to achieve between doing better and accepting graciously what is here in the present. I started with something basic a little over a year ago, mindful eating…because I’m a dietitian and that goes together with screwed up about food. This time of year the gimme comes out and the teeter totter tips, maybe that’s why New Years is such a time for resolutions.


About jeaninerenzoni

Camera toting, dog trainer, cat trainer, horse trainer, flower gardener, book reader, always finding something new to be interested in and research. My newest undertaking is my new pup and all the training that goes with raising him. I must get back to painting watercolors in my art room. Finished and looking for new ones in the library's DVD collection. About me ... Dog trainer for over 40 years, multiple obedience titles on many dogs, showed in conformation, ran a grooming shop, trained lots of people and dogs. Also have a BS Nutrition, CRD, CTM, AKC CGC evaluator, was NAHQ, was licensed in life/health insurance, long-term care consultant for 25+ years, Covey facilitator, team trainer, project manager, R+ trainer for people, etc ... you could say I believe in qualifications variety.
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